An Eulogy To Plett

Plett. Oh how I´ve missed you my beloved Plett. I almost forgot just how beautiful you are! Barely never came back. But destiny didn´t agree on that. Fate brought me back here, after all this time, and you still manage to take my breath away with your timeless beauty. Why did I ever let go of my plans of moving here? I can´t remember. How was I even able to forget the feeling you could make me feel? Well, the answer to that is quite fatuous: because of a boy. Both times. Back when I first came here, I absolutely fell in love with this little piece of earth, this peaceful and friendly neighbourhood-town. But my heart already belonged to someone else. The relationship was still fresh, and I missed him like crazy. So I couldn´t allow myself to really get involved here. I needed to focus on going back, and I was, in the back of my mind, counting the days until I would get to see him again. But when I got back, and we didn´t work out, my thoughts came back to you. I wanted to come back to you, and I seriously started making plans to move here. Until somebody else crossed my path. Yes, correct: another guy. Although I did try and hold on to my plans to come here after summer, when me and him broke up, I suddenly didn´t feel like I could do it anymore. Suddenly I changed plans. I forgot about you. But never really. You were always there, somehow, deep down, buried in my heart, waiting for that spark to light the flame on fire. I can´t tell you which spark was strong enough to burn. But suddenly, I felt the flames, light and tickling in the beginning. Almost displeasing… but one surge of motivation in one particular moment was enough to make me book my trip to come back to you. But I did spend my days left questioning my decision, even after I boarded the plane. It was one hell of a journey down to you. You can´t even imagine. 24 hours I was on the road. Or in the air. I forgot how far it was. But then, finally, George. Even flying into the southern Cape, I recognized you immediately from out my window. Robberg Peninsula as your particular characteristics: I would recognize it anywhere. How beautiful you looked from up there. I forgot about the massive mountain range that separates you and the desert. How green and alive everything looks. The ocean right there, strong and wild. I could not wait to land. The drive from George back to you, once more-stunning does not even nearly touch the brick of it. Cruising through wild green Jungle and mountain valleys with wild river banks, high bridges and coastal roads. I felt like in a dream. How come I did not remember this so vividly? How come, this did not feel like Africa at all?

Reunited! Back in Plett, I felt this strange sense of peace overcoming me. Like I´d be coming back to an old friend after a very long time. I couldn´t believe it. So I didn´t. “I´ll enjoy it while it lasts!”, is what I told myself. Until the next day. After a couple very stressful weeks in Switzerland, all I wanted to do here was relax. Recharge my batteries. So we went to the main beach in town. Very commercial, average, very frequented. But still. Peak-season is over, and there were no more than about 15 people on the beach that day. We looked for a little space to ourselves and got comfortable. I simply lay down, closed my eyes, listened to the waves crashing ashore and breathed. Heavy, deep breaths, as if I could finally let go. My shoulders dropped, and I could smell the sea breeze on my tongue. The seagulls screams sang me to sleep like a foreign lullaby always known, and there it was again-this peaceful feeling in my chest, warm and happy. I smiled before I gave myself to the ground, sinking in to the warm sand that slowly welcomed me home.

The next time I woke, David decided to go play in the waves. I watched him do so. He jumped and dived through the wild white foam, just underneath, to get out in the safe spot right in between two waves. Getting ready to take his first wave, he started paddling towards the beach. The first wave hit him, but lifelong training growing up here helped him get on top of the wave, simply using his body as a board, surfing until the wave subsided. I could see his face bright up like the sun, even from so far away. And again, I smiled, with tears in my eyes. Suddenly, the flames that have been flickering all this time exploded, and a fire burning hot and longingly inside my heart erupted. I instantly knew, that I haven´t felt this happy in a very long time. Pure, simple happiness for this moment. I was filled with thankfulness, that spread throughout my whole body, dripping out in tears of joy from the corner of my eyes. And with it, I thought of my grandma. How much she would have enjoyed seeing me like this. But I was sure, she did. Wherever she was-I knew in this moment, she could feel my passion running through my veins like a fever. I felt connected. Home. Like I had finally arrived. Me! Me who never felt like I belonged anywhere. Who never wanted to stay. Never felt safe and… content. Calm and comfortable. I did here. All these things, it seemed like everything just fell into place, like my puzzle piece finally matched, after all this time.

The next day I decided I wanted to jog on the beach. By myself. And I did. David showed me how to get there from our Airbnb, which was like a ridiculous five minute distance away. I plugged in my headphones and started off. It was morning, maybe half past nine, and the beach was practically empty. I ran close to the water, where the sand was wet and I wouldn´t sink in as much. And I ran. And ran. Taking it all in. The waves, crashing ashore, huge waves collapsing onto the sand. I can´t stop gazing at this astonishing beach-completely wild, left as it is. Untamed, raw wilderness. I even come across a dead seal lying in the sand. And still-my heart speeds up, light as a feather. Not because of the running. Magically, my legs just do the work automatically, flawless, effortless. It is the beauty of nature that keeps taking my breath away, over and over, and leaves me speechless and in awe. And I realize with astonishment: since I arrived here, I have not felt restless. I have not felt the urge to leave, to flee, to get away. Here, I just live, right this second. Nothing else matters but this day, this place, this moment. And suddenly I feel like I could do everything I ever wanted, be anything I ever dreamed of. Everything suddenly feels within reach, within my capacity. I feel strong and fearless, and I can´t explain where all this energy comes from that I feel I could take on the whole world by myself with my own bare hands. Everything feels possible. I never feel that way in Switzerland. If I would, I probably would have packed my things by now and started a life here. But once again: another man came into my life. And suddenly, there´s more to think of in the equation than before. Suddenly, I´m back to where I started. But what feels so impossible there, feels totally effortless and simple here. An inevitable path I´ll have to take, and no matter what detours I will lose myself to on the way…everything will always lead me back to you. An undeniable truth, and no matter how long I walk blindfolded through every obstacle that might occur…the path will always lead me here. Like a necessity, something that needs to be done anyways, like laundry or lunch. Because maybe, destiny does exist, and it does have a plan for everybody. And maybe, that even includes me. Maybe I do belong here. Maybe I was always supposed to be here: Plett attracting me like a magnet. Maybe, the two of us were always meant to be. I barely dare to hope: Maybe, I have found my place? Maybe, after being lost for so many years- feeling betrayed, left, lonely and tossed like trash- maybe finally I have found a place that my damaged and leery heart could heal. A place I could once again call home. I barely dare to hope: what if I´ll finally belong, resting in peace-for the rest of my, hopefully many more years to come, life.